Rule No.119 - It's okay to be fat. So you're fat. Just be fat and shut up about it.

This rule comes from none other than Roseanne Barr. And really, could you imagine anyone else saying this. There is an element of truth in this though and I can say that because I am guilty of whining about it every now and then. I think every single person is guilty of this at some stage or another. It might be because you have curly hair, or dead straight, a pear shape body or an apple, long thin fingers or short sausage ones.

We will always find something wrong with ourselves and for what? To moan about it to someone that would give anything to have curly hair like yours? It's okay to have a skew nose, it's okay to have beauty spots, it's even okay to be as dark as the night or as white as a snow man.

It annoys everyone else around you when you complain and just makes you feel bad about yourself, so either accept what you have and be happy, or start making changes. The Brazilian Blowout is amazing and can help you start changing the way you feel about yourself, and if bandage dresses don't go well on your body, wear something else that does go well. Work with what you have and the sooner you start loving everything you have, others will too.

It's true! Think I heard that somewhere before. ;)

Elle August SA

PS. Do yourself a favour and get the South African August Issue of Elle and read Sarah Koopman's article "Weight-lifting". A-ma-zing. If you can't get it, give me a shout. Worth the read!

Comments

Rule No.33 - Never kick a fresh turd on a hot day

Okay, rules are back and what a classic one! This quote is by Harry S Truman. He was the 33 rd president of America, historians call him “a controversial president”, the band Chicago wrote a song just for him and he has a commemorative holiday in his name on the 8 th May in Missouri. This is brilliant advise, not in the literal sense, well, that too, but if you having a seriously bad day, don’t make things worse by deliberately doing something that will bite you in the bum later. I did this the other day, so I am talking out of experience here. I went into a situation and then on the way out, after realising it was a bad situation, I kicked a fresh turd cause I was so mad. (again, not literally, although, that might have been a better idea in hindsight) My advise in this circumstance is to stay indoors that day until you have calmed yourself down. I’ll leave you with another quote from Truman : A pessimist is one who makes difficulties of his opportunities and an optimist is one who ...

Rule No. 76 – Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

I was on a plane last night on my way home and after my original idea of having a really awesome nap after two extremely tough weeks being completely thrown aside thanks to my hard of hearing peeps behind me that thought it necessary to use their fists on the tray to make a point, and they had a LOT of points, while bashing my chair at the same time, i decided what better time to think about this rule instead. Use my time productively. Then, somewhere between my eyes rolling back in exhaustion and semi consciousness, i looked over to the other row and there was a lady with her wallet on her lap, sorting out her slips, throwing away her bank statements. Brilliant. Seriously though, why would you want to keep them? We all do, just in case we need it for something, but when have you ever really needed them?These days they give you the option if you want to print out the receipt or not. Do yourself and the tree's a favour and just say no. Sorted. Now love letters. Aaah, love letters. I...

Rule No.59 - If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

"Bull", meaning nonsense, dates from the 17th century, while the term "bull*&$*" has been used as early as 1915 in American slang , and came into popular usage only during World War II . The word "bull" itself may have derived from the Old French boul meaning "fraud, deceit" (Oxford English Dictionary). The term "horse*&$*" is a near synonym. Worthy of note is the South African English equivalent "bull dust". Few corresponding terms exist in other languages, with the significant exception of German Bockmist , literally "billy-goat *&%*". Funny, Suze Original and I were talking about this the other day. She went for an interview and we were laughing cause we both do the same thing. They ask you a simple question that could be answered in a line or two but we both start elaborating so much trying to make a good impression that what started as "My favorite hobby is... right to.. and that's why I...

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