Things I have learnt about Spain so far...

* Siestas are not a joke. If you think you going to find a shop, that isn't a Chinese shop, open between 2-5 you can think again. This is serious business. Or lack there of at least.

* Having a shot of vodka, equivalent to our South African triple, with a glass of water on the side at 9 in the morning is totally acceptable. I swear, I saw it this morning at the little cafe in the bus station. Didn't know whether to laugh or join in.

* If you taking the bus, make sure you have some way of telling the time. Having the correct time in a bus is not a priority here. In fact, I have not been on a single bus yet that is showing the right time. It's as though the driver spins the wheels of the clock every morning and wherever it lands will be the time that the bus will use for the day.

* Wednesdays seem to be pensioners day out on the buses. If you hoping to be on time, take a taxi. Some old folks take up to 5 mins just to board, never mind get the money out and paying. Bless.

* The weather is a lot like Cape Town. If it says cold with 90% rain, take your coat, umbrella, wellies, bikini and sunblock. What it should say is pretty cold with 90% chance of all seasons during the day. Okay, obviously not as drastic as that,but it does change quite often during the day.

* Learn how to speak and understand Spanish, fast.

* The Spanish people love their big white cut out letters for the names of each town. Very sweet

* Most graffiti done here is by true artists. You are more likely to find an artwork than silly, seemingly 'meaningless' scribbling. It's everywhere though! Wherever you look, you are bound to see at least one graffiti artist work around you

* It seems, and I stand to be corrected as it is purely my own limited visual knowledge, that what you drive is of a higher priority than what you live in. I have yet to see a kokoroche (mostly illegal taxi and car held together by glue, duck tape and a prayer) round here.

* Pedestrians actually use the bridges over the hi ways here. There are no death defying acts of trying to run over the hi way. You simply walk a little further and use the bridge. Incredibly sensible.

* kokoroche is obviously my own unique spelling.

Comments

Rule No.59 - If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bull.

"Bull", meaning nonsense, dates from the 17th century, while the term "bull*&$*" has been used as early as 1915 in American slang , and came into popular usage only during World War II . The word "bull" itself may have derived from the Old French boul meaning "fraud, deceit" (Oxford English Dictionary). The term "horse*&$*" is a near synonym. Worthy of note is the South African English equivalent "bull dust". Few corresponding terms exist in other languages, with the significant exception of German Bockmist , literally "billy-goat *&%*". Funny, Suze Original and I were talking about this the other day. She went for an interview and we were laughing cause we both do the same thing. They ask you a simple question that could be answered in a line or two but we both start elaborating so much trying to make a good impression that what started as "My favorite hobby is... right to.. and that's why I...

Rule No. 76 – Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

I was on a plane last night on my way home and after my original idea of having a really awesome nap after two extremely tough weeks being completely thrown aside thanks to my hard of hearing peeps behind me that thought it necessary to use their fists on the tray to make a point, and they had a LOT of points, while bashing my chair at the same time, i decided what better time to think about this rule instead. Use my time productively. Then, somewhere between my eyes rolling back in exhaustion and semi consciousness, i looked over to the other row and there was a lady with her wallet on her lap, sorting out her slips, throwing away her bank statements. Brilliant. Seriously though, why would you want to keep them? We all do, just in case we need it for something, but when have you ever really needed them?These days they give you the option if you want to print out the receipt or not. Do yourself and the tree's a favour and just say no. Sorted. Now love letters. Aaah, love letters. I...

Rule No.63 - Don't long for the unripe grape

"It’s clear that to blend together unripe grapes and over-ripe grapes doesn’t result in a balanced wine. Indeed, under-ripe grapes are completely undesirable and can ruin a wine, not add freshness." Nothing worse than a bad wine so why on earth would you long for the unripe grape. What beats a gorgeous glass of Sauvignon on a hot day, or sitting by the fire in the middle of winter with a delicious glass of Merlot? I know, not much! By longing for the unripe grape you just trying to hurry a good wine which just is not done. Okay, I make joke, this is quite obviously not what this rule is about. I understand it as a patience rule. By longing for the unripe grape you are only torturing yourself and putting an unnecessary pressure on yourself, where you could just be at peace with it and give it time to grow into the most amazing fruit. Somebody I used to know once complained about an unripe grape he had and made himself miserable, but with time and patience now, i think he has...

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